For many years I lived with constant worrying, fear, and anxiety. I assumed it was a part of life which everyone has to deal with. However, when I decided to sit down to re-evaluate my life on the direction it was headed 20 years ago. I realized it was not normal or healthy behavior. Looking back at the roots of the problem stemmed from my mother’s constant worry when I was a child. In order for her to protect us from going through the same problems she when through, she would constantly prevent us from enjoying many activities. Many of these activates are key to allowing a child to experience life and grow into an healthy happy adult. Things such as camping with friends, going on a cultural exchanges, or dabbling in new activities.
I remember my sister wanting to head over to Japan to teach English for a year. She had applied and was accepted to go. My parents were okay with it until a few weeks later they suddenly changed their mind. They said it was too dangerous for her to be alone over there. I felt bad my sister didn’t get a chance to to experience a new culture when she was younger. I can understand my parents concerns if she was a teen but my sister had just graduated from university. She was a fully grown adult who was capable of making her own decisions at this point in her life. In my opinion you can only shelter your children for so long. They will make mistakes but they will learn from them.
When we worry about everything in our life on a daily basis we tend to forget to stop to enjoy what life brings us each day. Stop for a moment, clear your head, and look around you. Forget about your worries for a few minutes. Notice the sights, the sounds, the color of the flowers, and take a deep breath. This makes you realize how lucky you are to be living. You’ll begin to appreciate having food, shelter, great friends, family, and a healthy life.
It’s no wonder why we as a society are consumed by so much negativity, worry, and anxiety. The news bombards us daily with images of violence, economic turmoil, and natural disasters. These are subconsciously embedded in our memories. Then we head to work and talk about it some more with others. We login to our social media accounts only to find more of the same stuff.
One of the things I’ve always enjoyed since I was a kid was watching people interact with one another. Their use of body language, eye contact, and tone of their voice. As an coach and instructor I find it fascinating seeing the different types of personalities in my classes. One of the biggest things I’ve noticed over the years is how much people really hate what they do for a living.
However, when I ask them why they do it, they say do it solely for the money. Many can’t wait to retire. I often see them come to class frustrated, worried about their job security, politics at work, and every little thing in life. Their worry is so bad some have a hard time enjoying the workout. Many become sick more easily as their immune system becomes run down by stress.
Statistics show that roughly a little over 90% of the things people worry about are about things that will never happen, past events they cannot change, or matters which are not important.
So why are we as a society letting things we have no control over rule our daily lives? In order for us to start living our life happily today we must learn put aside our worries. I’m going to share with you some tips on how to stop worrying about everything starting today.
1. Ask yourself what you are worried about
Identify the worry and why it is making you anxious. Perhaps it may be an important presentation you have to do for some high level managers in your company. Once you acknowledge the worry you will begin to take the necessary steps to alleviate it.
2. Take action to eliminate your worry
One of the best ways to get rid of worry is to write it down on a piece of paper or on your computer.
Secondly, write down what is the worst case scenario should that worry come true. In most cases it’s not as bad as you originally thought. This will reduce your anxiety and stress levels immediately.
Third, accept the worry should it become true. Accepting it will let you know that it has happened and you have nothing to worry about.
Forth, now that the worry has become true. Take action to minimize the worst possible outcome. Working on a solution will make you view it not as a problem.
3. Living in the moment
Stop worrying about tomorrow, the next day, or years down the road. Worrying just gives it more power to rule your daily life. Remember most of your worries will not come true anyway.
Taking actionable steps is the best way to get rid of worrying thoughts. I have students who are extremely nervous when they compete in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu competitions. I always tell them to not worry as it is normal. I just encourage them keep on competing and eventually their nerves will disappear with more experience. They may still experience nervousness but it will be more of a by product of excitement then fear.
Well, the weekend is finally here again. Have a safe and wonderful weekend. Once again if you found this article informative please feel free to Like, Tweet, or comment below!